Transgender Monologue

I was born in 1952.
So, in a sense, was Christine Jorgenson.
"Ex-GI becomes blonde beauty!" screamed
the headlines when I was six months old.

The headlines are no longer
quite so self-assured,
but the subtext hasn't changed.

Trans this, change that,
but go from one to the other.
Don't stop in the middle,
that's much too confusing;
under or over shoot and it's
camp or drag or impersonation;
mix it up and you're just a freak.
Fuck that.
Do you think I'm standing
outside some store, choosing
from what you want me to be?

Ah, no.
It's not like that with me.
I'm not working within the system.
I don't care if I rock your boat.
Drowning offers more freedom than the
life-jacket you want me to wear.

I wrote the above when I thought I might participate in the "Transgender Monologues" session at the 2002 Midwest Bisexual Lesbian Gay Transgender Ally College Conference at Michigan State University, organized by Rachel Crandall of Transgender Michigan. I did not make it to the session, but I support the general idea of such a session. Trans stories are many and varied and need to be heard, especially in today's conservative "I'm just like everyone else" times.

That's what I thought, here in East Lansing in the spring of 2002.